well..i'm up tis late..so there sure muz b a problem..and ya..there is..i've been tinking alot lately...n wat was i tinking bout?..surprisingly?..kevin khoo..i duno wat the hell has gotten into me la..it's lyk..i'm super mad at him..but at the same time i feel the urge to talk to him everyday lyk last time..so now...i duno whether it's cuz i miss talkin to him..or do i 'miss' miss him..haih..i know i love jeeva ryte now..but sometimes i feel like smtg is missing..lyk..there's a part of my life tat even jeev cant fill...i noe tats wen i turn to God...but..haih..wat i really wana noe is why?!..why ignore me just cuz i invited GSLC youth to my church concert?>..only to hav u ignore eveything i sent to you n wen u decide not to ignore me..u say it's my fault then invite GSLC members to YOUR church musical..haih..so i really wana noe y?..haih..i would curse..but..made a deal wit jeev to NOt curse...gosh..yea..n today i got a christmas present frm u..haha..funny ryte?..i tot u wun even bother bout my whereabouts...it as a necklace..wit a cross pendant..not much..but surprisingly it was exactly wat i was looking for..smtg that wun rust wen touch sweat or wtr..since i wana wear it full time..but oh no!!it's frm you..DUDE!!u freaking messin wit my mind la!!!haih..i such in deep shit ryte now..but i noe im not falling for you again la dude...never again..
haha..guess what?.. he suddenly couldn't walk me cuz he woke up late..haha..and last nite he say he gna make sure that he walk wit me bullshit la tu, he woke up late and needed to go find job at sunway,.i noe job more important,but hey,if u noe u can't keep up to wat u say then DUN SAY LA!!!wtv la,went to the court anyway,then played ltl while then it started to drizzle,wtv la,then it started to get heavier so went bk la..n of cuz since u not here,so i had to go bk alone la..but chai hua walked wit me till his house,it was raining!!!and my mom and bro was out!dad at work!! v could've stayed till late..but no..wat bullshit u telling me all..eeyer!!!!!haih..wtv la...
I'm weak when;
I'm with you,
When;
I talk to you,
When;
I see you
When;
I think of you,
I hate it when i turn weak inside whenever it comes to you,
I feel helpless when it comes to you.
it's been a while since i've updated, so here i am now. err..lets see...haha..i and him sudah reach two months..broke my old record..went out on the 116th, tot wana watch princess and the frog with him,but he got hung over and stuff...stupid boy(his official nickname), so,watched alone with charlie,haha..typical disney stuff la, but wun recomend to small kids since i find it rather disturbing with all the voodoo and stuff..then went christmas shopping,got lok,mom and bro present..haha..of cuz i din forget his present la..haha..so i guess tat basically it la..
today,haiyo..shopping shopping shopping...==..ma fan la..but i finaly bot my dad's present..haha..yea..damn stupid la..i guess,tats basically it la, other than tat is all, b.ball and stuff..my life practically quite simple..haha...if i got time i'll explain in details stuff la..but recently kinda lazy..haha...minta maaf ya..
p.s. the previous two post was,i was bored and started to write,it's obviously not done yet and just beggining..haha...hopefully this time the story has an ending..wish me luck..=]
‘Why? Why me? Of all people on the world? Me?’ thinking as a swayed thru and fro on the swing. Recapping what had happened at the elevator early that afternoon when my brother and mother got into their usual quarrel. I fastened my eyes on the currently grey sky and just drifted away. It’s not my usual spot on the hill but it was good enough. Imagining the field as my personal park in front of my 3 storey big bungalow, equipped with a basketball court, and a swimming pool, personal spa, lots and lots and lots of multi colored flowers, often visited by glittering pixies and fairies to relax and just play around. Shimmering fairy and pixie dust being able to be seem through out.
“Go home!” the thunder shouted at me. I instantly returned to planet earth, dreading every moment of it. Rains drops started to fall and the drizzle soon turned into a pour. It rained so heavily that I couldn’t see where I was going. Just when I turned into the corner to my housed, I saw the figure that met my eye on the hill the other day. His body still shining as ever, eyes stared straight at me. A lightning flashed and he was gone. Another strike of lightning and I lifted my legs and started to run back home.
I was soaking wet by the time I reached my house, which lead to my mom nagging at me. Instantly I gathered my fresh clothes and my towel and headed to the bathroom. I stepped out of the bathroom and dinner was already set.
In my room after dinner, I tried to come up with a logical explanation for that weird boy I keep seeing. So here I am now, writing down everything for you and for me. Just in case anything happens to me in the future, some people will actually know my story.
It’s Sunday morning and I was watching the sun rise at the top of a hill. The sun glowing yellowish orange and the birds were singing their melodies tunes, the winds brushed against my hair whispering sweet tunes to me. When al of a sudden out of no where, I heard someone or something call my name. I turned but saw no one. It was breaking dawn, which concludes that the rest of the world was fast asleep in their beds at home. Ignoring the ridiculous thought of someone spying on me, I then returned back to my world.
My world, a place where there’s nothing but peace and harmony, a place where no harm can be found. This world of mine has no family problems, no jealousy, no one getting wasted on worthless things such as alcohol. A world, were brothers and mothers don’t try to bit each others head off every five minutes, a world were young girls don’t try their hardest to impress the boy they like by being mellow blue Barbie, a world were teenage boys don’t spend their allowance on pubs and slutty bitches just to be laid. But the one thing that makes my world special, are the things found in them. In my world, every corner you turn, every road you see, every sky you look at, there exist all the mythical creatures ever thought of. From dragons to goblins to mermaids, from pixies to fairies. What I wish most on this earth, are a pair of charcoal black wings, strong enough to lift me off the ground the take off to any part of the world, to touch the clouds and join the birds in their dance.
Well, that is only my world; truth is, in reality, nothing is as good as fantasy. I broke away from all those crap, and headed back to reality. My mom had already done the laundry and they’re now hanging at my front porch. I come from an average home; have just enough money for things we need but not enough to live in luxury. I stepped through the front door and saw my parents getting ready for a day of work, my brother still sleeping in that bed of his curled up like a hedgehog. I headed back to my room to my bed, curled back under my blanket and stared at the ceiling, returning back to my world once again.
The next time I woke up, was to the sound of my television, my brother has woken up and due to the fear of supernatural things, he switched in the television so that the house won’t be in pin drop silence. I walked out of the room and I saw him face towards the computer, currently addicted to the thing called facebook. I changed and headed out once again. I headed towards the part of the hill I always go to. The thing bout this place is that I am not disturbed. No one has ever came to this part of the hill, yet alone dwell in this place.
I was just about to drift back into my world, when suddenly I heard my name being called once again I heard, and just when I thought there was no one, I heard one of the bushes rustle. Gathering up all my guts to find out what it was, I got up and headed to the bush. I looked, but saw nothing, I tried looking around but also saw no one. As soon as I turned around I saw a figure right behind me. This figure was human sized, had curly brunette hair, sharp nose, small mouth, crystal blue eyes. He had skins that look like they were made out of jewel. I thought I was dreaming, I rubbed my eyes, shocked my head but it was still there. It looked at me in curiosity and so did
Concluding that that was bit too much of an excitement, I once again headed home. By the time I did so, it was already noon. Lunch was set on the table and brother and mother are once again fighting, no surprise there. I grabbed my lunch and headed back to my room to figure out what had just happened. It couldn’t have been a dream, cause if it is, it must be a really long dream since I’m here snacking on my lunch. Putting that thought aside, I switched on my MP3, picked up a book and sat and read.
well...im back from my church christmas function...haha..crystal came bout 5.45..by the time v reached bout 6.30?..haha..went in..so funny la...went in saw most or3/4 of the ppl in army pants or shirt..haha..i wore my army skirt..since my pants bit cacat lookin..haha..so...klbol went army bebeh!!haha
started bout 7.30..started off wit a game..then worship..power la!...haha..then the drama...most interactive drama in the past 2 years...haha..kena surrounded by "soldiers''..commander was joshua..then we did tis 'drill'..so he calls it la..v were spilt into 4 teams..i was in the 4th team..team leader?adrian lim..haha...team members?me,cheryl,debbie,meeko,her fren,paul(sm other fella)and supposingly his gf la...i tink..so v were suppose to come up wit a team name..1st mission...
team one:tarzanites
team two:shockubutsu
team three: mask raiders
team four(our team): sat sei(means kill in canto)..reason? cuz our team team 'sei' wat..haha..
2nd mission..tink of an attack and defend action
haha..tis one of cuz cannot write la..but wtv it is..it was chao mm lang kang..haha...
then drama continue..it was super nice la..but still chao mm lang kang...haha...of cuz la..klbol ma..haha..i'l post bout the drama wen i got time la..haha...
after tat..joshua spoke..
next..prayer..
l8r..finish
b4 last..clean up..
haha..cleanin up also super dumb la..debbie actin lyk a mom all..haha..u'l make an awesome mom debbie..haha
lastly..yam cha!!!
bttw..it took us super long to clean up the place since the church whole stage looked lyk a jungle..haha..literally...
yea..after tat usual la..i got home late..but i dun care..cuz i had a blast..and 2mr i'l most probably go b.ball wit klbol anyway..so yea..=]..
p.s. sry guys..2dat i lazy wana highlight the key words for u..XD
2mr is our church havin our youth function..haha..yea..and sadly Bi got some last minute stuff..cannot come..=.=...sad case la...wtv la..
anyway..had a great time today..haha..correction..i had a great evening wit bi today..the story was..at 5.15..v were suppose to go..he suppose to meet me at the ally lyk usual..but then he got sked of my bro..chicken..haha...so i went alone..reached the court..it started to rain..==..so went bk..then at 6 plus it stopped so he asked me go out..so went la..then..saw him talking to my bro..after my bro left..he came n talked to me a ltl while then went to carey for futsul...so went to the court(again) saw nobody so went home..then got msg frm bi..saying got no ball..so ask me come out(again)..==..so went out..then met him at the ally..(again)..then jus lepaked there..super cacat place to lepak..haha..but wat to do..that's where most of our stories are..lol...so..v talked and all..then bout 6.55...v departed our ways...haha..after so long v finally got some time to our selfs..haha..no need go in detail la..lol..
but now bit dissapointed that he cant come 2mr..=[..was looking forward for it..=[..nvm la..not lyk there wun b another event...but u goin ns..so my church valentine function also u cannot come..lagi =[..
so..ysterday i went to Charlotte's place cuz going to carmen's place for a sleepover...reached there bout 7.45...then for lunch v made burgers..haha..v like super noob in the kitchen..haha...v at 1st couldn get the patty out of the packaging..haha...then wen v put it on the pan lyk thingy to cook it..haha..no need talk la..flip the stupid patty also got problem..then v wanted to cut it into half to cook the inside..haha..lagi noob la..charlie took lyk..15 mins on 1 patty..but me?..haha..i pro la..haha..cut the other 2 patty's in 15 mins..haha..i guess i can take up culinary arts then..then cooked the buns...then finish!!..eatin time..v made 3 in total..2 for us..the other for renee..then nee came..ate..then carmen came..
reached carmens house..started off by watching 'the proposal'..then played games..bath then went for dinner..which was at sunway..buffet steamboat..in the car on the way there v were planning on gettin a cake for carmen.so plannin plannin..at the end...v couldn't figure out anything cuz the place v go no where near got bakery..so i tot of asking carmen's mom to help us by driving us to the nearest bakery which was at kings..aunty said ok..so v're cool...during the dinner also qute cool..haha..aunty super sporting...eat gile banyak...fuahlaowey!!eat more than me la..haha..
after dinner...v tricked carmen tat v feel super cram in the car so v follow her mom..cuz b4 dinner..carmen,renee,dayana,charlie and me were in carmen's dad's car..her mom n bro use another car..so renee and i told carmen that feel very cram in the car..so v follow aunty..she at 1st gave me a look..i tot she din fall for it..but wtv la..go only la..so went to kings..was chosing the cake..while choosing..carmen called..ask where v were..haha..i jammed then crapped to her saying that some random car broke down n got traffic jam..tat 1 also i tot she wun fall for it..haha..bot the cake then went bk..as soon as v reached she came out the house..i was in a conflict whether to hide it or just pop the bubble..cuz i tot she saw the cake ady..but try only la..haha..went out the car..was trying to hide the cake..RAN into the house..ran to the kitchen to get the cake ready..tat time super scared..haha..then dayana helped me wit the candles..n asked renee n charlie to distract carmen for us..haha..charlie duno wat to do so she just went up to her and said
"eh,u want any songs?"
haha..so wen it was ready..v brought it out..then carmen saw it n she super jam!!haha..she din realize v were up to smtg..haha...so v succeeded..haha..her face was priceless la..haha..so tat s the surprise story la..haha..
after singin n eatin cake..v played some games and played twister..haha..super funny la..pics i'l upload ltr on...
watched movie..
talked
slept at 4..
DAY 2
woke up at 8..renee ask
"u awake ah?"
answered her.
went bk to sleep...
haha..woke bk up at 9..then got ready go lagoon..haha..had mamak 1st..then left..
i mls wana really blog bout wat happend there la..but wtv it is..the rides were all ok..EXCEPT the TOMAHAWK..due to my fear of height..i totally stoned after the ride..wanted to cry ady..i was shaking wen i got down..couldn't take it goin 90,180 nor 360 degrees...yea..still traumatized bout that ride..haih..shouldn't hav went in the 1st place..
so...tats it for now la..mls wana blog ady..haha..
im bored so...tot i'd diss some song lyrics..haha..exactly wat carmen does when charlotte is singin n she's bored..haha..
the green ones are my own ltl "translation"
You're on the phone with your girlfriend, she's upset
PMS-in!!!
She's going off about something that you said
Sensitive girls memang like that
'Cause she doesn't get your humor like I do
Pure bitterness..=.=
I'm in the room, it's a typical Tuesday night
jom..yam cha
I'm listening to the kind of music she doesn't like
old skol
And she'll never know your story like I do
ever tried writting it in a book?
But she wears short skirts, I wear T-shirts
slut(said so by carmen)
She's Cheer Captain and I'm on the bleachers
perky-ness
Dreaming about the day when you wake up and find
haha..same lyk me..dream dream dream only
That what you're looking for has been here the whole time
really?
If you could see that I'm the one who understands you
I can't
Been here all along, so why can't you see?
Cause im blind
You, you belong with me, you belong with me
Walking the streets with you and your worn-out jeans
ghetto
I can't help thinking this is how it ought to be
den dun tink..meditate..ummm..
Laughing on a park bench, thinking to myself
0.o...psycho
Hey, isn't this easy?
A,B,C,D,....
And you've got a smile that could light up this whole town
thousand volt smile..haha
I haven't seen it in a while since she brought you down
get it bk la
You say you're fine, I know you better than that
thou shall not lie
Hey, what ya doing with a girl like that?
haha..lol..dun wana noe..
Standing by and waiting at your back door
stalker
All this time how could you not know?
mayb cuz ur dumb?
Baby, you belong with me, you belong with me
Oh, I remember you driving to my house in the middle of the night
haha..fail to go home ah?
I'm the one who makes you laugh when you know you're 'bout to cry
borned clown
And I know your favorite songs and you tell me 'bout your dreams
awww
Think I know where you belong, think I know it's with me
well..lets just say im not really having a good nite..haih..i got frussed when i couldn't find my palate for my painting..i tink my dad took it..haih..then jeev and i were talking bout louis' dog..then he asked if i wanted it..i told him..
pedigree dogs expensive to take care la..if i want i adopt frm spca..and mayb wen i'm living aone only i do so la..
When you live alone?!..wat happened to me..
then the nite started to fall..im giving my teory on how and why girls in the 21st century dun need guys to support them n stuff..then..ya la..he said that his dreams were crushed and stuff..and that our relationship is ntg more than a puppy love thing..that i wasn't gna be wit him till whenever...
thing is..when he said that he was thinking bout the future and stuff..it kinda included a family..and being me..i don't believe and trust in a happy family..cause there's no such thing..the husband/dad will start flirting wit gals frm work and where nots..mom/wife will break down..and obviously they will fight..n wen they do..they cant let it out on the youngest child..so the eldest will hav to deal wit the crap the parents are givin..and that wen they finally decide to go for counseling n what nots..the child who kena the most has already started building a protective armor against the world..the child has tot herself to live life alone..a trained survivor..so yes..i fear the world..i dun trust much..
then v talked..settled things out..then he ter-send tis msg to me:
hw many times mst i tell u im wit sme1 ryte nw..im nt like last timei've changed cus of her..sry bt keep dreaming..
apparently there was a girl,his ex..who proposed to him n stuff..
after mostly clearing things up...well..v're basically clearing things up la..the best part is..both of us are using quotes and poems to do so..n im loving every moment of it..
haha..that title?...cuz my bro came bk frm Singapore ady..haha..yea..so last day togeta wit bi witout interference..so..left at 5...this time he no energy to attempt in scaring me frm behind..haha...went to court..only amir there..so went to mamak wit him...he actually wanted to smoke..but since i was there he din...haha..thx..love you soooo much..so..yea..the mamak fella asked him if i was his gf..=.=..lol..then went to the court...normal la that one...
then louis came..wit his bro..wit 2 dogs!!..sry..correction..pupies!!..Siberian husky and Pomeranian..the Siberian super CUTE!!!grey-ish white..blue eyes..AHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!,,haih,,,even bi got ntg to say ady..haha..
then...started to drizzle..ppl went bk..lepaked for awhile...then walked bk..since v dun hav much personal time witout my bro around..v had an awesome ending.(but truthfully..im still afraid)...too bad it din rain if not sure super romantic..or so he says....haha...i really pity joel la..haha..sry bro!!
by the time i went home..bro was already there...so..yea..haha...no more alone time..haha..
well..today i manyak syok cuz bro not at home..mom at pinang...dad at work..so i had the house to myself..chill i din let anyone in..not even Jeeva..haha..so...tis mng suppose go play basketball wit willy,shan and terrence one..but then it was rainin..and it rained the whole day..so mng..ntg much..
afternoon...bout 3.15 adrian lim came over..went yam cha-in..dang..v yam cha for 2 hours leh..haha..talking bout joony and church camp and stupid stuff la..haha..yea..i belanja-ed him..haha..no big la..
then evening went out again..this time wit jeev to the field..haha...damn syok..no brother to kacau..no mother around to worry bout getting caught..haha..felt lyk a free bird..
left at 5.30..went to the ally to wait for jeev..then he suddenly came from behind..haha..he fail case..he wanted to scare me frm behind..haha..fail..haha..went there..talk talk talk..feeel so nice la..can just talk..me next to him..haha...no need worry bout bro all..haha..=D...then he went to play futsul..btw..the court was freaking wet..wen joel came went to shoot hoops...then..haih..i slipped and fell..slippery ma!!haih..n just wen jo passed the ball and i was determined to score...fail case la..haih..super determine somemore..tgh semangat then fell..=.=...haih..
at bout 7.10 walked back..haha..sharma,sasi,and joel left us alone..lol..then walked..then jeev told me that he tot sasi pushed me down n wanted to go kick his ass ady..then he realized it was i sendiri slipped..==..then at the junction..haha..no need say la...overall it was a good day..till..haih..
To:
My best fren,i hope you know who you are:
I love you,and im grateful to have a fren lyk you...but just tat..haih..u constanltly tink boutdeath...i try to help you n tolerate as much as i can cause i bet this was wat u guys went thru wit me last year..and now i noe how you all feel..you are lyk..my best fren la dong..i hate seein you lyk tis..everytime i help..you listen..but the next thing is tat you forget wat i tell you n all and go bk bein emo..i don't know wat ur goin thru..and mayb if you tell me exactly y u feeling lyk tis then mayb i can help you better..if it's cuz you tink no one cares bout you then ur freaking rong ok?...in my life testimony at the pool party i said "altho it felt lyk no one in the world loved me..i KNOW that He does"...remember...that you hav us..the whole gang of us here to back you up..STOP tinking of all the negative things..i mean..life is as good as you look at it..if you look at the world a piece of pitch black and negativity..then ur life n world is gna be lyk tat...so start looking at the happy parts in life and ignore the sad parts..it's wat im doin..but hey..once again..i can only give the advises..the choice n ur doings are up to u..haih..
i wish i could come up wit 50 bucks in a day la..then my problems would all be cleared..haih..i just feel lyk..haih..duno lar..if my parents pay 4 me then i dun mind..but im doin chores almost everyday..and gettin cash ltl by ltl..
clean toilet-6 bucks
Iron dad's shirt- 5bucks per piece
Sweep and mop floor-5 bucks.
wash car-5 bucks per car.
Vacuum inside of car-3 bucks
TEll me!!..how can i come up wit 50 bucks by next week? and i still owe ppl cash...haih..dear Lord..please help me...and tinking of the future is makin things worse..i just feel lyk crawling up some where..
well..lets just say that due to things happening and money shortage..i cant really go out much..and sunway lagoon is just too expensive for me..the entrance fee already burn hole in my pocket..the food..i tink i starve better la..if it was an outing to a mall and catching a movie..tat one i left wit 15 bucks in my pocket also i dun mind...cuz movie most is 13..the food can go buy bread to eat..but sunway..is lyk..haih..if i got an income then at least ok...i can't come up wit bout 60 bucks in less than a week...now you see y i need a job..but i 60 to 70 buckscant find any.. guys..it's not only cuz i sked my parents marah y so many times go out..and im not putting jeeva over you guys..it's just that comparing to an outing to the mall..it's much more expensive..cuz in the mall at the most u use up to 30 bucks..but sunway in total it's already bout..i just dun hav that amount of cash..and i dun wana rely on any of u...but watever it is..i'l make it up to you guys k?..=]..sry..
haha..muz be wondering why put that title ryte?..haha..i also duno...just so happen got the renovation feel..haha..since im at my dad's office now and got construction goin on..haha..yea..at dad's office now..manyak bored la..haha..i also duno wat to blog about..yea..but just now on the way here i saw this cloud that looked lyk a bird..i took a pic of it..and my dad was lyk..wat u doin..told him bout the cloud he laugh only..very funny meh?..==..
now..on9..wi-fi bit cacat..hopin bi will come on9..cuz i wana try out the webcam..haha..haih..missin him now la..=[..but wat to do..mom n bro not around...so hav to follow dad..not tat im not lyking it..just tat 1 to 2 days cannot c him only ma..yea...
conclusion here is..im bored!!!!!...
today mng went to play ball again la..duh..my life is practically ntg but basketball la..haha..super cacat..yea..i actually woke up at 7.45..then i slept bk..haha..woke up by willy's msg..then he called..hahaha..then went..apparently he called his fren who called his fren..n 1 of willy's fren's fren i knew....his name jason wong...smtg la..haha..then had a 4 on 4...oh..btw..carey panalty shot line SUCKS!!!!!!!...keep air balling...eeee!!!!!!!yea..anway...had an awesome game..haha..henry said i was top scorer..haha..thank you thank you..but 1 thing i realized..jason wen he lay up..i tink the sky split also he sure score one..=.=..then after that went yam cha then went to shan's house..for wat?...NAIL POLISH REMOVER!!...get rid of the black on my nails..was getting kinda annoying cuz i wanted to play the guitar but nails too long..n if i cut sure look very ugly...haha..took me one hour to get rid of it...=.=..iah...sad la..nv gna paint my nails in a very very very long time now...
afternoon..slept till willy called...said goin for b.ball in the evening..ok la..then did bit of sudoku..talking to jeev..then got ready..then told jeev tat wen he reach the ally to tell me..then i go out..BUT..it started raining..d*...haih..dun curse dun curse..at 6 it stopped..so jeev told me he goin to the ally...(i smell maggi mee now..hungry la..=[ )..then he msg-ed me wen he reached...
i walked to the ally..saw him playing wit that stupid stray dog..i dun lyk that dog..look so gila..haha..then..haha...no need go to that part la..haha..went to the court..called jo to come..he came..shot some hoops...by 6.40 it started to drizzle..so went bk..waited for jeev to come since he went mamak...so walked home..b4 i left towards my house..haha..tat's another part i no need to tell..haha..
the end
